To be sealed

I guess, in a way I'm glad it happened.

I no longer know how I feel about this. Tired? It's time to stop struggling and give in. I wish I had realized this earlier. In two weeks' time I will have to bid goodbye to these thoughts and come back to it a year later. Packing all of my thoughts up and off they go into storage.

The feelings, though, will still be here..

Realizing what's important, sacrifices have to be made. Sacrifices have to be made all the time. This time it's having to deal with everything.

And I hope, that a year later when I return to the same place, things will have changed in a good way. And another year. And another year.

Time's a scary thing.

If things have gone past the point of no return, there's nothing to be done, is there?

Regardless of whichever stage of life it is, it's crucial to strike a balance between everything without ever compromising integrity, principles and priorities while living one's own dream. Because the world's constantly pressuring us into giving in till we lose who we are and end up living a copy.

Defying the world. It's the challenge I've taken on.

God answered my prayers on that very day a week later. The one I wrote on the paper in church. So I've been learning and growing since then. Learning to see after reality slapped me awake. Identifying the most essential things, identifying my dreams. Learning how to completely surrender to God. And learning how to love.

There, soon I shall seal it up. I will wince in pain when the feelings move while in hibernation. It's a long winter. A winter I've cast upon myself. And God will give the little tokens of happiness whenever needed. Somewhere deep down I know my heavenly Father will smile as he witnesses me grow.

Things I have to leave behind. Things will find its way back if it's God's will.

So I'm sealing this.